Is My Loved One in a High-Control Group?

1. 1.Has your loved one significantly reduced contact with you or other family and friends since joining this group?
   No; our relationship has continued normally.Some reduction in contact, which they explain as being busy.Clear and significant withdrawal from family and old friends.They have almost completely cut off contact with us and other outside relationships.
2. 2.Has your loved one's personality, values, or way of engaging with the world changed significantly since joining?
   Normal positive growth; they seem happier and more purposeful.Some changes, but they still feel like themselves.Noticeable personality changes; they use different language and seem more rigid.They seem like a different person; natural warmth, humour, or curiosity has been replaced by group doctrine.
3. 3.Does your loved one deflect, avoid, or become upset when you ask questions about the group's beliefs, finances, or leadership?
   They discuss the group openly and welcome questions.Some questions make them defensive but most conversations are fine.Most questions about the group are met with deflection or mild hostility.Any questioning is treated as an attack; they become distressed or angry.
4. 4.Has your loved one made major financial decisions — large donations, surrendering savings, selling assets — since joining?
   No unusual financial decisions.Some giving to the group that seems within normal bounds.Significant unexplained financial commitments or changes.Dramatic financial decisions that are putting their future at risk.
5. 5.Does your loved one express fear, anxiety, or distress about what would happen if they left the group or questioned it?
   No; they speak of the group as a free choice they could end at any time.They are enthusiastic but have not expressed fear about leaving.They have expressed that leaving would be spiritually dangerous or unthinkable.They show clear signs of phobia about leaving — anxiety, panic, or distress when the subject is raised.
6. 6.Does your loved one use a great deal of group-specific language or concepts that make normal conversation difficult?
   No unusual language; they communicate as they always have.Some new vocabulary has emerged but we can still communicate well.A significant amount of group jargon shapes how they discuss everything.Conversations feel like speaking to a different person; ordinary concepts are filtered through group doctrine.
7. 7.Has your loved one made dramatic lifestyle changes — diet, dress, schedule, residence — to conform with group expectations?
   Minor lifestyle adjustments that seem like genuine personal growth.Moderate changes consistent with joining a religious or health community.Sweeping lifestyle changes that have disrupted their previous life significantly.Their entire previous life has been restructured around the group's demands.
8. 8.When you express concern for your loved one, how do they typically respond?
   They engage warmly with my concern even if they disagree.They defend the group but still seem to value my perspective.They dismiss my concerns as stemming from ignorance, jealousy, or spiritual blindness.They become hostile, report the conversation to group leaders, or distance themselves from me as a result.
9. 9.Have you been able to find reliable, independent information about the group and its practices?
   Yes; the group is transparent and well-documented by independent sources.Some information is available; the picture is mixed.The group is opaque; ex-member accounts raise significant concerns.The group actively suppresses outside information; ex-member accounts describe serious harm.
10. 10.Do you have any reason to believe your loved one's physical health or safety may be at risk due to the group (e.g., medical care denied, isolation, sleep deprivation)?
    No physical wellbeing concerns.Minor health or lifestyle concerns that may be normal within this faith tradition.Noticeable physical changes — weight loss, exhaustion, visible stress.Serious concerns about physical health, medical neglect, or safety.
11. 11.Has your loved one been pressed to recruit friends or family into the group — and how do they respond if targets refuse?
    No recruitment pressure; they share their experience but respect others' choices.They invite others but take refusals in good spirit.They feel compelled to recruit and seem genuinely distressed when people decline.Refusing to join has strained or ended the relationship.
12. 12.Overall, how happy and fulfilled does your loved one genuinely seem compared to before they joined?
    Clearly happier, more purposeful, and more themselves than before.A mix; some genuine positives alongside concerns.Outwardly happy on group topics but showing signs of underlying stress or anxiety.They appear unhappy, diminished, or fearful beneath any surface contentment.

Answer all 12 questions to see your result.